Buzzer Bummers

Why can’t the Aggies ever be the last second victor?

I know we trailed the whole game, but that comeback was killer and it was against our arch rival on their home court and our team was made up of 2nd and 3rd stringers, so getting that win would have been AWESOME!

But no.

We’re USU and our athletic program motto is: “Hey, we’re the Aggies and we come sooooooo close!”

For some reason that still works to recruit decent players. Maybe athletes come here because they want to be the one who breaks the spell. They’ve all watched The Natural and get big ideas about being USU’s “Roy Hobbs.”

I hope we do find our Roy Hobbs, or maybe we need to hire that “two-bit carnie hypnotist” who worked on the cursed New York Knights baseball team by telling them “Losing is a disease, as contagious as bubonic plague.”

We’ve got a plague of some kind, because the past three games have all been lost by last minute baskets. Arrrrrgh!

My heart can only take so many breaks, guys.

I’m getting older. I’m not as resilient as I used to be.

After I do my Insanity workout dvd, it takes like four days before I can walk with bent legs again.

You gotta hand it to Morrill for his coaching ability, though. After losing most of his starters, in a matter of weeks he’s managed to put together a competitive team from the bench. In fact, I think Morrill’s greatest strength as a coach is his ability to take what talent he has and synergize it into a great team.

It’s fun to watch, just pull it together at the end for me, boys!

I will say, watching players bounce off of BYU’s football-to-basketball transient, Kaufusi, is fun too.

On the up side, I went to the Mountain Crest vs. Skyview game last Friday night and the Mustangs pulled off the basket-at-the-buzzer win, so I got to be a winner that night.

And I also went a little more deaf that night.

Does the music have to be played THAT loud?

It’s a gymnasium.

Can’t we factor in the acoustical effect of echo and adjust accordingly?

I’m all for hyping up the team with some pregame and timeout tunes, and I know “If it’s too loud then you’re too old,” but I even saw teenagers covering their ears, and this from a generation who live with earbuds blasting their brains out 24/7.

I mean, even the microphone the chick used to sing the National Anthem was blasting loud. She sang beautifully, but I had one hand over my heart and a finger in my ear, which I hope wasn’t disrespectful.

If my brother-in-law who’s an audiologist in the military and a colonel would have been there he would have pulled rank and shut the whole thing down on grounds of health hazard.

By the end of the game my ears were ringing and I was hoarse from yelling, and that wasn’t from cheering on the team. It was from trying to have a conversation with my friend who was sitting right next to me.

I looked down at the sound table to see who was the culprit for the torture, assuming it would be a bunch of unsupervised young punks, but it was actually a group of geezers!

Now it makes sense.

They’re already hard of hearing and so they have to blast it to hear it themselves.

That also explains the playlist.

But we won!

Now, come on Aggies, follow suit!

The Bracket Buster is this weekend and if being a basketball fan is going to be a health hazard for me, I at least want to slowly lose my faculties and eventually die a winner.

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