How to Be an Olympic Loser

JBIt’s a wrap! The Winter Olympics officially end today, which means it’s time for me to get off my duff and go conquer my own winter elevation: Mount Laundry.

Yeah, I’m a bit behind on household chores, but it’s been totally worth it to eat out of the same cereal bowl three meals a day for two weeks. I barely noticed when we ran out of milk four days ago.

It’s been a great Games, chock full of ethereal champs and epic chokes.

I’ve loved it all—even Bob Costas getting booted off the air for grossing out the world with his goopy pink eyes.

While there have been some amazing highlights—Utah native and skeleton silver medalist, Noelle Pikus-Pace climbing over people in the stands to get to her family—you might be surprised by what I’ve decided is my favorite Olympic moment.

As the most decorated American skier in history, Bode Miller is used to being king of the mountain. But after his third disappointing run in Sochi, Bode was on the sidelines whining to his wife about not being able to find his groove. While I’m sure Morgan Miller has both cheered and consoled her ego-chubby hubby at the bottom of many ski runs, a candid camera caught her giving Bode a healthy dose of tough love, “Come on, I need some positivity out of you.”


For a moment Bode forgot he was competing in his 5th Olympics.

He forgot that he makes a living as a ski bum.

He forgot that at 36 years old he’s a geezer skier yet still qualified to compete in five Olympic events.

He forgot that despite having a history as an irresponsible partier and philanderer he managed to convince a 6’3” blonde beauty to say “I do.”

Of course, Bode came to the Olympics wanting medals.

Everybody comes to the Olympics wanting medals, but not everybody gets to win medals.

In fact, if you think about it, most of the Olympics are about losing, so a lot of talented athletes have to decide what kind of a loser they’re going to be.

Are they going to be the kind of loser who stands by a halfpipe and complains that he failed to medal because he’s just had to endure Olympic spirit “too long”?

Or are they going to be the kind of loser who finishes 9th in figure skating then sits on the interview couch opposite Meredith Vieira and gushes with excitement about how awesome it is just to be part of it all?

When you’re used to being the winner, it’s easy to get spoiled and forget to be grateful and honored just to be able to participate in something like the most elite athletic competition and celebration in the world.

Morgan Miller’s verbal smackdown to be positive was a good reminder, for me too.

After all, I get to wash clothes for the people I love in the warmth and convenience of my very own laundry room. I need to remember there were times when I had to heft baskets full of dirty clothes into the car, drive to a laundromat, spend hours in a drafty, stinky. . . forget it.

Laundry is exempt from positivity.

Leave a Reply