Okay, maybe not the best invention ever. I should probably give a shout out to penicillin, electricity and online school lunch payment, but DVR is right up there.
One of my favorite things to watch on TV is college football and I would love nothing better than to camp on the couch for hours every Saturday from August through December, but let’s be real. Life doesn’t allow for that—at least not for a woman anyway. Guys can get away with it for some reason, but Saturday is family chore day at my house and somebody’s got to crack the whip on the kids so they don’t grow up believing cleaning fairies really do exist.
Now with DVR even Dad can join in the battle against the youth retirement movement since he can no longer say, “I can’t right now, the game is on.” While we work together to clean up messes and attitudes on crisp autumn Saturdays, numerous collegiate clashes can be recording for our viewing pleasure after the work is done. And the best part is, with DVR we can watch the games in less than half the time!
We can skip past all the beer commercials that make it look like a 12-pack bought at the corner gas station comes complete with a perfect body, lots of beautiful friends and no consequences. We can skip past all the previews of the increasingly skanky movies and network series, which are obviously not considered as part of the overall content when a TV event is given a rating. We can skip past the lengthy footage of the EMT crew checking out an injured player on the field, commentators commenting about the injured player on the field, and so on.
We can just watch actual football footage—plays in quick succession one after another. In fact, the handy dandy 30-second skip button on the remote skips exactly from play to play, unless the team has a hurry-up offense in which case you don’t need it.
This way I get to see more plays, more teams and more games in less time AND get my Saturday chore list completed while accompanied by another adult!
Wins all the way around, right?
I think so, but I know there will be naysayers.
I realize football viewer purists would argue that all this skipping misses out on the overall atmosphere of a football game. They like watching a game live in its entirety, glorified beer commercials and all. They think a football game isn’t something to be rushed through, but something to experience—the good, the bad, and the ugly half-naked coeds body painted in school colors who could care less how embarrassed this makes their mothers. They’d argue that the chore list will always be there, and less isn’t more if it’s more of less, and kids will always believe in cleaning fairies so why not kick back and relish in the moment?
I’m sure there’s some deep metaphor on life in this as well as a revealing analysis about my personality and family relationships, but I don’t want to hear it. I just want to keep really loving DVR and lots of hyper-speed college football.